Wednesday, December 9, 2009

The 10 Commandments of College

Student was searching for divine inspiration. Student walked high on the mountain of knowledge and came across God. Student asked God how to live life as a college kid should. And God said unto him, follow these Ten Commandments and you shall be all a college kid is. And Student thanked God and it was good. And Student spread the Ten Commandments of College to all.

I- Thou Shalt Nap
And God gave unto Student a great gift, the gift of napping. God said to him, You shall spend half your day napping. You shall nap in class, in your room and in your friend's room. And God said, if you don't nap, you will not be able to stay up all night drinking. And Student said, Nap I shall, and it was good.

II- Thou Shalt Get Sick All the Time
Now God said to Student, you must be sick all of the time. And student said why. And God said unto him, you shall share drinks, stay up too late, drink too much and make out with people you don't know. Therefore, God said, you shall be sick all year round. But God said, blessed are the sick for they have partied the hardest. And it was good.

III- Thou Shalt Write Witty Away Messages
Student asked, but God, how will I show everyone that I am funny? And God said unto him, thou shall write witty away messages. God said to student, you shall never just say you are in the shower, you shall say you are getting wet and the shower. You shall never say you are at class, you shall say you are class. God said, if you do not write witty away messages, I shall smite you. Blessed are the funny, for they will get many girls to be their friends but never hook up with them. And it was good.

IV- Thou Shalt Wear a Hoodie
And then Student asked God, God how do I look like a college kid. And God said unto student, you must wear a hoodie, for it is a useful garment. And you shall never wash it either. Student asked God what kind of Hoodie should it be and God said, you shall own one with your school's logo on it and you shall own many others of varying colors and creeds. And Student was pleased and God was pleased.

V- Thou Shalt Shit a Lot
And Student asked of his bathroom habit and God told him, Student, you shall eat in the Cafeteria and you shall shit a lot. And it will not be good shit, it will be the shit of the devil for your ass shall burn for hours. Your school shall put laxatives in their food and you shall feel their pain. And Student began to weep, and God said unto him, Student, fear not the shit, for all your fellow students will be experiencing the same. And Student dried his eyes and thanked God and God told him to use wet naps to ease the pain.

VI- Thou Shalt Eat EasyMac
Student asked unto God if there was any alternatives to the cafeteria, and God said to him, you shall eat a lot of EasyMac. It is easy to make and you don't need milk or a stove. And student said microwaves were forbidden by the RA. And God said to him, you shall hide the microwave under your bed with a towel on top. And Student asked, what if it is discovered. And God told him to stop being such a pussy, and it was good.

VII- Thou Shalt Hook Up
Student then asked of sex. And God said, Student, you shall hook up and be happy. You shall go home with random people every weekend and forget about them the next day. You shall see them at class and be awkward amongst their company. You shall exchange saliva at bars and parties and it will be good. And Student became gleeful and God told Student to wrap it up because He knows where she has been, but Student does not.

VIII- Thou Shalt Join a Club and Never Go to Meetings
Student inquired of his spare time and God reminded him that he should be napping. But Student said he wanted to do other things. So God said unto him, you shall join a club at the beginning of the semester, but then never go to meetings. And Student asked why he should not go to meetings, and God told him, because the glee club is gay. And Student understood His wisdom.

IX- Thou Shalt Wake Up Confused
God said to Student, there will come many a day when you shall wake up in the bed of another and not know where you are. You will not remember what you did last night and you shall be confused. You will see that you have nipple rings and a tattoo now and are covered in Sharpie. And Student was disturbed by this, but God said, you shall tell great stories about it to your friends someday. And Student understood and God took a sip of a beer.

And God gave Student the final Commandment

X- Thou Shalt Gain Weight
And Student wished to hear the final commandment and God said he would not like it. But Student insisted, so God said unto him, you shall gain weight. However, God said, you will not buy new clothes, so you will wear sweat pants a lot. God said, Student, you will watch a lot of TV and become fat to which Student wept profusely. But God comforted Student saying, you will still get ass even if you cannot tie your shoes anymore. Student felt better and God pointed to Student's chest saying, those will soon be bitch tits. And it was good.

This is the word of God, follow the Ten Commandments of College or you will be smote!

Friday, October 30, 2009


Went on a nature walk today..

Sami and I had a tad too much fun..

It was a beautiful day.

Monday, October 26, 2009

Freshmen 15..

My body hates me. Well, it hates the food in the dining hall. Its not my fault they make the fries so good!

Recently I've gotten and 81 on my last Biology test, and an 89 on one of my papers. I'd say thats pretty spiffy.

A lot has happened over the past month:
1) Lawanda, Dana, and I decided our room was too cramped the way it was so we got bureaus that go under our beds which raised our mattresses to about 4 feet off the floor. It may not sound high, but try sleeping like that. It is pretty intimidating. I now have to take a running start to just get into bed. And its always fun having to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night and forgetting you are that high up and sliding into the abyss..

2) I have learned how to swing dance! Kinda.. I've learned the charleston, and some twirls, and the rock step triple step triple step. Its once a week and the instructors take people who are interested to a swing dancing club every monday so we can get extra practice. I haven't gone yet but it sounds AWESOME. Maybe during the holidays I can teach everyone some moves.

3) I am officially broke. Enough said. At least I have a job.. sort of.

4) Speaking of jobs, I work at the Hampden Family Center in Inner Balimore now. Every Wednesday, I hop in a van and go tutor kids. They come to the center after school, we tutor the kids for an hour, and then we get to play on the playground for an hour. Its probably the best job I've ever had. The kids are so sweet, but the stories they tell you are heart breaking. They are really great kids dealing with things no one should have to deal with. Just last week I was told by one little boy his dad was in jail for the fifth time and how much he misses him. He said he would like to meet his baby sister one day who lives in Philadelphia. What do you say to that? Its hard sometimes, but when the kids hit that playground they can just be kids. I play tag with them and once we found a praying mantis, so I gave them a little biology lesson on the jungle gym. They all wanted to kill it, but by the time I was done telling them about it they wanted to take it home. Every time we walk back to the center from the park, two little girls (it changes every week) hold my hands all the way back. We skip and I sing "loo loo skip to my loo" and they love it.

5) Every semester there is a school wide game of "tag" you might say. Its called humans vs. zombies. Basically, zombies go around tagging humans until there are no humans left. It is played 24/7, and things can get pretty intense. Humans wear bandannas on their arms or legs, and are allowed to carry nerf guns and socks as protection from zombies. If a zombie is hit by a nerf dart or socks, he/she is "stunned" for 15 minutes and cannot tag any humans. Zombies also wear bandannas, but on their heads instead of the arm or leg. The most recent game just ended and there are still socks and nerf darts scattered throughout the campus. I didn't play this time because I had to work on a paper and I knew if I played I would get way too into it. It was a good call on my part.

So, that's basically what has been happening. Halloween is coming up and everyone here is excited. I am going to be a lady bug this year and a few of my friends and I are going out trick-or-treating. Can't wait! Also, there will be a showing of a documentary called "Food Inc". Here is a trailer for it (should be interesting):


Well, Thanksgiving break is November 25th-29th. I hope the family can get together for dinner! Miss you all!

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Party Hardy

:) When I woke up sunday morning, this was on my door and people wrote birthday wishes all over my white board. And our neighbors from next door left a birthday hat for me, which I wore to the dining hall. People waking down the main drive all wished me a happy birthday. I've never felt so loved by random people.

Mom and dad also came down with morgan. He made himself very comfortable in my room while he met all my friends. After everyone met everyone, the Griffith family went for a walk to see the horses on campus, and to the old equestrian field which is now used by the track team. Its very pretty there, and we all got a good walk.

My friends and I took Ma and Dad to lunch in Stimson, one of the dining halls. Mom found a rubber band in her food. Whoopsie! The food is really good I swear!

After lunch mom and dad left, and I thought my friends and I were going into towson for my birthday, but sadly I learned that dana had to go work on a project with ben, and suyana and corinne had to do some homework quickly, so I was told to hang out with Sami or Lawanda. I did neither. I went back to my room to shower.

An hour went by. A knock. I open the door, low and behold, there is everyone with a cake blazing with candles. How amazing are these people? They all sang for me and we all had some delicious cake. Im so lucky to have met such awesome people. Only a week as gone by, but I feel like I have known them for ages. They are all so smart and funny and nice. This is going to be a great four years, I can already tell.

Right now, I'm thinking a scooter ride around campus before that 3 hour chemistry lab is needed. Oh and I think my laundry is done! Please tell me what everyone else is up to. Miss everyone.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009


Orientation is officially over!!

It felt like summer camp with all the activities we were doing. We went to a baseball game (which got rained out..), went though baltimore, ate as large masses. It was great. But we were all itching to start classes, so i'm glad yesterday was our first real academic day.

Here is a picture of the stadium. It was the Orioles Vs. the Cleveland Indians. The game was actually in the 6th inning and it got rained out. But it was ok, we all just went and danced in the rain! :)

and here's a picture of some of my new friends!
From left to right, its Dana (MY roommate), Corinne (hall mate), Sami (the coolest welsh guy I've ever met), and Suyana (Corinne's roommate)

So the first day of classes was yesterday, and all I had was modern dance because our biology lab was canceled since we have had no lecture. Modern dance was at 9, and I was actually really grumpy the night before because when I looked at the course description it said we would be learning the art form through lecture and readings and writings blah blah blah. So of course, I showed up in skinny jeans. Low and behold, we actually do dance in the class (thank god) but I was by no means dressed to dance. The teacher looked a little worried when she saw my jeans, but I explained what had happened and she was cool about it.

This woman is hysterical. She made us do this walking exercise where we "track" someone. So you have to get behind someone and try and imitate their walk. Oh and there are live musicians every class so this class we had a drummer. SO COOL. Then we had to pretend we were gorillas. I'm actually learning so much in this class.

Today I had like.. every freaking class. I had english, biology (lecture), chemistry (lecture), and I have frontiers at 1:30. That class is about Alternative Medicine. It'll be fun. :)

Also, BIRTHDAY WEEKEND! The big 1-9. My friends on campus are taking me out. I've met some really awesome people here. I'm feeling very lucky.

Saturday there will be an outdoor concert, so if anyone is interested in coming down to visit, you could come see that too. Tonight is the welcoming ceremony with the whole school. Each class has to wear a color, and ours is Blue. There is going to be a big chain of people from the old library to the new library and we are going to pass the last books into the new library. It will be very cool to witness.

Oh and our minifridge is finally coming tonight too. WOO!! I can finally have leftovers!

Well, I think that is it for now. Miss everyone! Hope everything is going well!

Friday, August 28, 2009

Oh what a night..

Im in.

Everything has gone pretty smoothly so far. We ended up heading down half an hour later than I wanted to, but its ok. We got down around 10:30 and had to get a ton of information before I could even begin to unpack the car. When I got to signing the housing agreement, I found out that one of my roommates (Dana) had already gotten there. And she got the best bed. But that's the way it is. You get there first, you get first choice.

So when we finally got to unload the car, there were some cool goucher students there to help us actually move my stuff into the room. They were super nice, but.. I don't have a great memory and I wouldn't be able to pick them out of a line-up if I tried. But the effort was appreciated. Dana got the bed in the corner secluded area (pictures to follow) and I got the bed against the other wall. Lawanda, being the last person here, got the bed in the middle of both of ours. Which stinks, but hey, she was last.

Mom and dad didn't linger too long (although mom wanted to) and after getting all moved in pretty much all of our parents left, and we headed to a welcoming ceremony. There, we got to hear the dean, the head of activities, and a few students on the advising board. Everyone that spoke was pretty funny and I think it really eased the tension of the students and the remaining parents. In this assembly, they asked everyone to say their final goodbyes, and I got to see some weepy faces. Which was, I don't mean to sound heartless, pretty funny. :)

After that, we broke into groups with our summer mentors, who had been contacting us all summer via facebook and e-mail. My mentor's name is Julia, and she is awesome. We sat under a tree and did an ice-breaking activity and talked about some important things we need to know coming onto the campus and the different things that would be happening the rest of the day.

After that we went to dinner and I was originally sitting all by my lonesome, but then 5 guys came over and we started talking about halo, and how much we could all eat. I think I'm going to fit in well here.

Apres dinner, we had a little extra time and we got to go back to our dorms for a bit and unwind. Then I heard a bunch of noise coming from the lawn outside my window and discovered another ice-breaking activity was ensuing. This one the whole freshman class stood in parallel lines and I introduced myself to about 100 people in about 10 minutes. Again, poor memory, although I may be able to remember a few faces if I saw them in class. Then we broke into groups again, this time with an adviser for our houses (I'm in Mary Fisher) and I got to meet a guy from Iraq. It is his first time in the US, he has only been here for about a month, and he already speaks perfect english. I on the other hand, have been talking french for 6 years and I can barely hold a conversation. WHAT AM I DOING WRONG?!

Then we had more free time, so Dana and I went looking for our house's common room. We stumbled upon it.. filled with a bunch of junior, senior, and graduated girls. And then they invited us to play apples to apples. I honestly, could not feel my face I was laughing so hard. Everyone here is so amazing. They gave me some pretty cool advice. :)

Finally, we had a house meeting. That was basically just info being thrown at us. And laughing with our CA's (community advisers). Finally, at around 10:30, we got to go back to our rooms. I was disgusting, so I had my first experience with a college shower. All I can say is.. Interesting.

Last night there was a terrible thunderstorm, and I couldn't get to sleep until around 3. So I munched on mom's homemade chocolate chip cookies, walked around the floor, and slowly but surely drifted.

Now its 8. And we have something at 9. What was it again? And was it mandatory? ... :)

Wednesday, August 26, 2009


Tomorrow is the big day..


Monday, August 24, 2009


Hello hello, fancy seeing you here. :)

You know what's super duper fun? Packing. And packing. And packing some more. Clothes, hangers, pencils, jars of nutella (which somehow never lasts long..). Its enough to drive a gal up a wall. Our entire front room is dedicated to stuff. Just two more days!

How about I introduce my roommates. Oh yes, there is more than one.

Meet Dana
She is super funny, very nice, likes to read and make art, and loves The Godfather.

Meet Lawanda

She is also very funny and sweet, enjoys music, and is kind of quiet.

All that is left on the to-get list is a mini fridge, printer paper, mattress pad, and a vacuum.

The past couple of days here have been filled with a lot of good-byes, and that is always hard. But I'm finally starting to see this is going to be an adventure, and it will be fun.. I hope. AHH, anyone have any advice before I leave? I'll take just about anything at this point.

We are leaving hopefully by 7:30 am on Thursday for check-in at 10. Then I will be all on my lonesome. Dun dun dun.. But I'm excited to start classes on the 1st. I will have modern dance, then get acquainted with my chemistry teacher in a three hour lab, and then head off to my "frontiers" class in alternative medicine. Basically this class is an ice breaker and I get to know the staff a little better. Its only for the first semester, so when its done I can take a class I'm REALLY interested in, like cognitive sciences! :)

If you are ever interested in sending me a small trifle, (PLEASE) here is my address at school:

Amanda M. Griffith
Goucher College Post Office
1021 Dulaney Valley Road
Baltimore, MD 21204

and feel free to send me an e-mail:

I miss my room already..